Rambling

I'm sitting on my couch thinking..
Trying to let my brain and imagination do all the work for me
I'm hopeless..
I know that I need to be strong.. for Irfan and the family that I value so much
I never thought that I would have to go through this difficult time
Yet this is the reality of life.. there are ups and down

I'm sitting on my couch thinking..
Everything happened for a reason
And that this might be a turning point
To a whole new joy and adventure
Oh how I wish there is a magical end
To this journey that I'm about to start..

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

I dont know why I'm writing this.. tapi rasa mcm best plak huhu. Ni supposely kena tulis resume but tulis ntah pape.

Anyway updates updates..I'm officially going to be unemployed in the next few weeks. Unemployment rate is so skyrocket here in Oregon. I got an offer to work in Independence, 3 hrs away from Gem's place, which is so tempting. But Irfan and Zuhri is my no 1 priority now. I want a career path that that has both my loved ones in the picture..
The only way we can make it work is if zuhri gets to move to Wichita, and I'll be working in Indy. And who's going to take care of Irfan? Mmmm..

Going back to school is not an option for now.. $25k a yr for tuition fee?!$% that's insane
We might wait for green card before we can pursue our post grad dream. Or both of us need to go back to school and get TAship.
I'm so freaked out. I guess this is what happened when you've been in the comfort zone for wayyy tooo looonggg.. *sob sob*

Back in Kansas City

It has been really cold for a few weeks after I came back here. I had sore throat & runny nose from the transition. It took me 2 weeks to be able to sleep at night & not sleeping during the day hohoho..

Kansas City skyline

Now the weather is much better, kinda like spring already. Last weekend on Saturday the temperature went up till 15 celcius. It was warm & sunny day, and we went to a nearby park to see its fountain. If you guys don't know, KC is known as the City of Fountains.. so you can find a lot of them here around the area (and mostly are small ones). 

One funny thing is that you can't really see the fountain these days because it was totally covered with ice, not from the snow, but from the water fountain itself. Here they let the fountain running all year long to avoid the water pipe from bursting.

Random Pictures from Msia visit 2008

Salam people..
I won't narrate all pictures. I'm feeling so down.
Picture say a thousand words, so ni la summary from our visit to Msia. I'll put together pictures at Perak later.
We're so blessed with the company of family and relatives.. I forgot to thank Mak & ayah for the kenduri. Pak lol did a great job with the gathering too. Food were delicious! I'm missing Msia already. I'm sure Irfan feels the same way. Enjoy..

Irfan & cousin Ashraff

My 'new' family at BP

Look at the food! Yummy..

Auntie, E & Irfan

Family Gathering Dec 20 08. All thanks to Pak lol & the cooks (Auntie, Anyah, Gem)

Family & Irfan

Dinner before Gem left for Utara trip

The morning before Gem's utara adventure


At Tg Piai..with the memory of Lalat+monyet huhu


Irfan happy faces at Batu Pahat


Our visit to Kampung


Our last morning at BP *sob sob*


Ayah singing his favorite song 'Tong Ka tong Ka tong'


Auntie Mah, Tok Ayah, Onie, Tok Tie, The parents & Irfan

Trip to Malaysia (Part III)

Taiping's visit:
1. Mandi sungai @ Kampung Jelai

I wasn't swimming, didn't know how to. Fortunately the water was quite shallow so just floating hehehe

Amin & the natural 'whirlpool' at the back :)

2. Ate frozen durian, bubur durian & nyiur kelapa muda



Perlis' Visit:
1. Meet E at UiTM Arau

This was the first time I went to Arau. The town was quite small, more like pekan. But I was impressed to see the U, kinda big with lotsa academic buildings. One thing I noticed, there were many girls than guys studied here. No wonder E met his gf here.... :P

E's new car.. Satria sports

Taadaaaa... I met Rizmi in person. I think she is shorter than cik Noii..

2. Lunch/Dinner with Pak Jee's family in Kuala Perlis

We were looking for a place to eat fresh ikan bakar & other seafood, so Pak Jee brought us here (I didn't remember the place, but it was somewhere in Kuala Perlis). Unfortunately I had allergy at the time, so I wasn't able to eat kerang rebus, sotong goreng.. :( :(


Jeles gile tgk si Azman ni mkn.... :(

Mentarang... the newest seashells in Msia. It's twice as big as kerang, and has ekor sticking out from the shell. Amin said it tasted like kerang, but I guess more muddy (?)

Here was the soup of mentarang.. I don't know why it was green in color :S but Amin said it was delicious & different (err...)



It felt so good to go back to Msia once in a while. I just wish that we got a chance to go on a 'real vacation' like going to Langkawi.. yuppp maybe next time!

Trip to Malaysia (Part II)

Bday Mak (& Ayah) party @ Auntie's house 12.20.08


That Saturday after Irfan's kenduri, Pak Rol invited everyone (including mak Elya's family) to Auntie's house for lunch. He asked Anyah to cook a few dishes (ikan pari asam pedas, ikan merah asam pedas, ketam masak pedas, sambal udang and kerabu mangga) for the gathering. Hehe I forgot to take a picture of the food (sbb dah lapa gilos :S).

Then.. the birthday part: We bought a choclate, heart-shaped cake to celebrate mak & ayah's bday. Funny thing, we didn't know until that day that ayah also bought a cake for mak :O! Now we had two cakes...

Cake from ayah

Then.. pak Rol said, ohh he brought a cake too (a cheese cake actually).. now we had three cakes :O LOL too much food & cakes for one day!!

Baby Irfan - 4 months old

My baby at 4 months old

Irfan dah 4 bulan a day after sampai from Malaysia. I cannot believe it, my little Irfan has become a young human! Huhuh selama ni tak rasa Irfan mcm org sbb he was so little and helpless, more like patung or a pet.
I think Irfan is about 12 lbs. He doesn't weigh much.
At 4 months old:
* Irfan dah rollover. Fully rollover on 12/18/08 on the kenduri doa selamat at BP. He rolled over in front of everybody ayah, mak, auntie mah etc
* Irfan dah pandai grab. Kalau letak toy at his hand, dia akan tadah tangan and try to grab. First seen on 1/19/09.
* Irfan has started to call maaaamaaaaa.. although we're not sure if he really meant it hehe. First heard at Perak.
* He's been sucking his left and right hand, and been touching his foot too. Irfan suka hisap jari telunjuk & middle finger. So cute.

I'll post his pic soon. This is just a quick entry. Mama might lose her job next week. sob sob.

Trip to Malaysia (Part I)

I finally have some free time to update this bloggy.. It's been a long time since my last entry & I would blame the super super slow dial-up in Msia :S

Some pictures on kenduri Irfan:



Irfan.. very quite & cumeyy sgt.



Most people thought Irfan is a girl because he looked like wearing a dress with all the labuci instead of baju melayu. Hahaha... but I think they missed the fact that he was wearing blue.. (so it's a boy!) And.. they thought that I'm the mama hohoho :S (sorry Janet)

Meng & Athirah.. mcm adik beradik plak pakai baju sama color

Me.. Elya & kak Inti

Irfan.. and the new 'mama' hahaha